How common is it for a girl to idealize and fantasize about her future wedding? My impression, at least in my circle of friends and our age demographic, is that it is very common. I used to view my wedding as a day where I would look perfect and feel perfect. All the things I don’t like about myself now would be different. And now, I am in the thick of things, planning a real wedding. Things cost money. I am busy. The magical wedding did not just appear.
My wedding dress is not perfect to me. What? No one says that! It is true. I think it is a big untold secret among many brides. Based on TV shows or whatever American bridal culture says, you are supposed to have a major connection and emotional reaction when you try on the dress. I am not criticizing or mocking anyone who was blessed to have an experience like that, but it was not my situation. My dress was inexpensive and available off the rack. It is not perfect to me. It is very beautiful and I am grateful to get to wear a nice dress. Many people will never get to wear something so nice in their entire lives. However, if I had unlimited time and money, I could have found my dream dress. The key difference is that pursuing a picturesque, magazine-quality wedding at all costs is not a worthy cause to me. It sounds simple, but my worth is in Jesus, not how nice I can make my wedding. It relieves so much pressure. I am enjoying planning a wedding and preparing for my marriage to David.
When you are a bride-to-be everyone wants to give you what you want. “It’s your day.” I can’t count how many times I have already heard that. Although I appreciate the selflessness people are showing me when they say that, this is decidedly not David and my view. The order of “who’s day” it is for us goes: God, our guests, us. Our philosophy is that our wedding is: “a worship service, where two people happen to get married.” When we view everything through that mentality, it elevates some things to great importance and diminishes other things as very, very un-important.