Do you think your husband is good at giving? Do you like the presents your husband gets you? You should. If you feel like the success rate of your husband’s presents has been “mixed” or even total strikeouts over the years, you need to stop not liking your husband’s presents.
A core trait of femininity is being receptive. It’s very feminine to, anytime someone gives you something whether it’s material or not, receive it with warmth.
This is with material things – your husband’s spend-y anniversary present, a child wanting to give you a weird little thing made from scraps in the yard. Or, immaterial things – your husband wants to put his arm around you.
Being receptive and receiving of those things that are their expressions of their love are significant in bonding them to you. Women should be very gracious in their essence and not quarrelsome.
You might respond to your husband getting you something with letting him know that it’s technically not the right version you wanted, or, you correct with, ‘I actually don’t like getting flowers and I’d rather have twenty dollars spent on something else.’
Anytime you do this, you have to acknowledge there’s a price. And I would say it’s in your best interest to not try to control these things. Being easy to please is a very good trait to have. When you receive a gift without critique it’s being vulnerable because you’re giving up control. And a key to being feminine is not being controlling. Delighting in something someone gave you brings you more intimacy because it’s an expression of them.
When I have counseled women this, an objection about money comes to the surface. Some think if he spent a lot of money on something she doesn’t really like and they didn’t agree on in advance, this counsel is not good.
As with so many things, if he asks you for input makes the difference! One commentator tells a story I will paraphrase here. Sure, if in advance your husband is asking you what color and quart size kitchenaid mixer you’d like. However, if in his love for you he wanted to select a gift and completely surprise you, learn to like the one he picked. Laugh with delight when you open it. It is so kind of him to provide this for you. The cost of telling him he’s not competent enough to shower his wife with a gift that pleases her is too high. Think of the color and how it reminds you a little of him every time you use it and I believe you will like it even more than what color you might have chosen. He will beam when he sees his sweet wife happily using it, restful and in peace about how her husband provides for her.
If your husband doesn’t get you gifts anymore, or it’s become a pretty clinical, utilitarian process, I wonder if you’ve been ungrateful and unfeminine in the past. Go to him and explain if you’ve been these ways about his gifts and that you want to be different with any presents he gives you going forward. Share you love the thought of him giving you gifts and you want to change from what you’ve done in the past.
Merry Christmas! 📯
Do you think your husband is good at giving? Do you like the presents your husband gets you? You should. If you feel like the success rate of your husband’s presents has been “mixed” or even total strikeouts over the years, you need to stop not liking your husband’s presents.
